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My Child Is Not Keen On Sharing School Experience With Me

Child Not Sharing with Parents You are very curious to know from your child, what happened at the school. So you start asking the moment your child returns home from school. But your child appears to be in no mood to describe or discuss with you. Without any enthusiasm, your child responds in mono syllables. You are disappointed. You want your child to share all the things that happened in school. You wonder how to make your child talk about his/her experience in the school.

How to make your child openly and freely share his/her experiences at the school?
What can you do?

Preschool children tend to talk a lot, very freely. As they advance to elementary school and beyond, some children veer away from their parents, leaving them with no clue as to why they are no longer forthcoming as before. Here are some tips to help you.

1) Being on the other side of communication with your child, it is entirely up to you to take charge and subtly influence your child to open up. Be very sensitive to spot the conversation beginner from your child. Depending upon how you respond to his/her initiative, the child decides whether you can be counted upon. So, give the confidence to your child by dropping everything you are doing and focus to listen and respond appropriately and lovingly to your child. Whenever the child indicates his/her desire to talk, you must make yourself available. This will boost the sense of closeness for the child with you.
2) Instead of asking bluntly, “What happened at the school today?” you may ask a leading question, ”Anything interesting at the school today?” This will prompt your child to start talking about the thing uppermost in his/her mind. Listen carefully without any judgment. You may ask further leading questions relating to what your child talked about, to continue the conversation. When you do this consistently, your child will gradually start developing the confidence in you and talk more freely.
3) Develop and nurture a close relationship with understanding, with your child. Take care to never criticize, ridicule or reprimand. If the child has done anything different from your expectations, understand that he/she has done so for his/her own reason. Separate the act from the child and explain how it could have been done differently, clearly elaborating on the consequences of his/her action as well as that of doing it the right way according to you.
4) If you sense that your child is stressed about anything, give him/her the chance to express the feelings by patiently waiting and encouraging all the while. Gently prompt your child to talk. Don’t jump in immediately with solutions. Instead, help your child to figure it out on his/her own, suggesting options and evaluating them. This will further boost the child’s confidence in tackling tough situations. Then there will be no more blocks for a free interaction with you.
5) As a matter of routine, spend some time exclusively with your child, doing things your child loves and have fun together. Don’t push your child to talk about everything you want to know. Let it flow on its own from your child, where there is no burden of expectations from you or fear of criticism or anxiety about reprimands with your child.

Being patient with your child, being available to your child whenever he/she wants you and listening without criticism or judgment will go a long way in helping your child to comfortably open up with you.

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