Are you experiencing difficulty sitting with your child to study? Is your child often avoiding to sit with you to study, on some pretext or the other?
As a responsible parent, you have always felt a deep concern for your child to excel in studies and get good marks and grades. You want your child to be well placed in future, for which you know your child must have a solid foundation in academic studies. So, you want to go out of the way to help your child in studies. But whenever you call your child to come and sit with you to study, he/she tries various tricks to avoid it. Even if your child forcibly sits, the study doesn’t last long as your child’s interest and concentration vanish soon.
You wonder, what is wrong? Why is my child averse to sit and study, along with me? What can I do to help?
1) First of all, check whether you are imposing yourself too much or intruding too often into your child’s freedom to study at his/her own pace. You are concerned alright, but does it mean that you should always breathe down your child’s neck? Your child may resent this constant surveillance and pestering from you and feel uncomfortable. You can avoid this by giving some leeway to let your child independently manage his/her home work and daily study assignments. Tell your child to sit for studying at a fixed time and duration every day in a disciplined manner and meticulously complete the assignment every day. Tell your child lovingly that you are always willing to help if and when needed.
2) Be friendly but firm with your child on the discipline of daily study at fixed times, before moving on to watch TV or play. Provide a comfortable, quiet corner for study and avoid all distractions. You may pick up a book or do some other activity while you hang around. Your physical presence must be reassuring, not threatening, to enable your child to study peacefully.
3) Do not go over to sit with your child unless he/she is stuck and asks for your help. While sitting with your child to help out, take care to be patient and explain lovingly, what needs to be done. Encourage the child to do the assignment on his/her own, after taking your help. You should not end up doing it yourself in the name of help, to save time or meet deadlines.
4) Never criticize, compare, reprimand or beat your child as you help with the study.
As the child gradually builds confidence in your true help and loving support, he/she will begin to shed fear, anxiety and discomfort of studying with you and will be more forthcoming in seeking your help. You should prevent your child from having a tendency of dependence on you. Your aim should always be to empower your child with solid support and guidance, to enable him/her to complete daily assignments independently.
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